mommyblog,  Motivation Monday

Mommy Indulgences

From sun up to sun down, Moms are constantly at work. We are constantly making sure the kids are safe, loved, and taken care of. Our daily tasks are never ending, and often times by the time we get one thing taken care of, there is a new problem that needs our attention. We are constantly being touched by sticky little fingers that demand us to pick them up and lug them around the entire house. We don’t even get the chance to pee in private; it’s just not allowed.

Motherhood is by far one of the most draining, frustrating, and emotional “job” there is. From listening to constant whining, wiping tiny little butts, feeding little humans who will want something different as soon as you give them their plate, cleaning up sticky messes, the list goes on and on. I mean–don’t get me wrong–I wouldn’t trade it for the world. They may be a******* sometimes, but I am theirs and they are mine. Love just doesn’t cover what I feel towards my children. That being said, I think every mommy out there needs to find some time, ok make the time, to self indulge in their favorite things. If we don’t make the time to have those self indulgent moments, we will quickly burn out. Call it selfish all you want. It is selfish, but, damn it, we deserve to be selfish. We need to be selfish for our sanity.

I remember when I was a first time mom, and my own mom would give me the same advice. “Make sure you take the time for yourself.” I remember thinking that she was crazy. How could I ever want to be away from this beautiful child that has given me more than I could ever possibly think of? I admit, I probably judged those moms who would leave their innocent child with their husbands or sitters, just so they can have a girls night out. Well, I truly and deeply apologize for that, because boy oh boy do I get it.

Why we need to have mommy indulgent moments

  1. It allows us the time we need to breathe and momentarily recharge. We are better moms for taking the time to recharge.
  2. We may be moms, but we are also individual women, and we shouldn’t lose sight of that.
  3. Making the time to have indulgent moments, helps to relieve any anxiety or depression, that is commonly brought on by motherhood.
  4. By taking the time to recharge our everlasting batteries, we are more apt to have intimate moments with our significant others.
  5. Our overall attitude improves if we allow ourselves to be selfish and indulge a little.

I’m gonna go ahead and say it, my mother was right (she knew this day would come too). You DO need to take the time for yourself. Time away from the kids, away from being mom, even if it’s just a mere 5 minutes a day. Find those few things that you truly like, and indulge yourself with them.

Believe me, you deserve it.

It doesn’t have to be expensive, it doesn’t have to take a lot of time, it just needs to be something that gives you peace or pleasure and helps to calm your mind.

Ways to mommy indulge

  1. Treat yourself to a monthly mani/pedi, or soak your feet in a at home foot soaker.
  2. Indulge in a glass of wine while you soak those tired little feet of yours.
  3. Get up early and practice a little yoga.
  4. Enjoy that $3.00 iced coffee, or create your own little coffee station.
  5. Join a women’s workout class. I love doing kickboxing and women’s boxing.
  6. Watch an episode or two of your favorite show while the kids are sleeping (or just suspiciously quiet).
  7. Go visit a local coffee shop or frozen yogurt shop and just sit down with a yummy treat.
  8. Get a monthly massage.
  9. Join a book club.
  10. Take a long bubble bath with a large glass of wine, a good book, and some dark chocolate.

It doesn’t matter how you choose to mommy indulge, just that you do it. My personal favorite is a good foot soak and a glass of wine while I watch an episode of Charmed. It’s time I give myself a night to just recollect myself so that come morning, I’m ready to tackle the day and all the chaos that comes with it. I feel better about myself every time I have a little mommy indulgent moment. Sometimes just a cup of coffee early in the morning is all I need to recharge and put some positive thoughts in my head.

Being a mommy is hard work, anyone who says otherwise is completely lying through their teeth. It is THE MOST demanding job there is, but it’s also the most rewarding. So, give yourself a break and make the time to mommy indulge. Do it every day, once a week, once a month, you do what works best for you. Just be consistent, and truly take the mom hat off and just be you. You will feel better about yourself, about being a mother, about life in general.

As always, from one Hotmess Mom to another, have a fanfreakingtastic day!


  • KrisBeeMama

    Self indulgence sounds way better to me than self care 🙂 we don’t have the extra money in the budget for a lot, but I may try to do an at-home coffee station!

  • Laura

    I love the photo of you with a glass of something yummy and your foot soaker – so cute!!! I’m not a mommy just yet, but I know the importance of self care! I think the hardest job is definitely to raise a child, or to raise anything, a pet, but really – a CHILD is the hardest! Kudos to you for getting real, and raw and HONEST! I LOVE YOUR BLOG! xoxoxo

    • itsahotmess04

      I thank you so much! I truly appreciate that. When I decided to start a blog, I promised myself I would be real and post about real issues and use real language haha.

  • Kim

    I love your style of writing. It seems similar to my own. This was such a good read. I realize as a first time mom that I need to take more time for myself. I have my reasons though but I know it is still important

  • Kelly

    Love this! It’s definitely not selfish to take time for ourselves. Your ways to indulge are great because it shows you don’t have to spend money or leave the house if you can’t/don’t want to but can still have me time.

  • Paula

    So important! I don’t think we realize it in the first few months but even a long quiet shower, having a little dessert in quiet, or going to to the store alone can recharge you a little. Every parent needs to find their way to do this daily for sanity.

  • Stephanie

    This is so important!! I learned the hard way when my oldest was a couple of months old. You can’t pour from an empty cup. My “me time” is usually after my boys go to bed. I watch a show or read a book or bake.

  • Sarah Muoio

    Awesome advice. It took me a while to realize that doing stuff for myself was not taking away from my little one. Taking care of yourself allows you to be a better Mom! Love your ideas and thanks for these awesome words of encouragement!

  • Tasheena

    Yes, yes, yes to everything! I’m finally having a mom’s night out later this week and am so excited! We definitely need these little breaks to recharge and be even better mommies!

  • Gen

    I absolutely agree for me time! But as a solo mom, it’s too hard to have one. Good thinf my daughter sleep early somehow i have enough time at night for myself.

  • Angela Tolsma

    I can’t stress enough how important it so for mothers and fathers to take time away from their kids and live. It’s important for the kids to see and important for ones on sanity. I love that you include a list that is good for all budgets.

  • Mommy Dearest

    Admitting that your Mommy is always right is the first step. Way to go. LOL I love you BabyGirl. You are a fantastic Mommy to 4 of my wonderful Grandchildren. I know I was criticized when I would finally say **** it and take some much needed time for me. Some may think it’s selfish but in reality our children benefit from a more relaxed, calm and happy Mommy! Love how you texted “Love and miss you” as I was writing this. 960 miles is only a distance on a map in in a Heart!!!!

  • Helene

    Being a mother is the most hard work in the world because you never stop ”working” for the kids. I totally agree, you should always have your time to pamper your self and take some rest also.

  • May Palacpac

    I totally agree! Especially on preserving our individuality because we do tend to lose ourselves in our children because they can get soooo freaking busy and the next thing you know, everything revolves around them.

  • Wendy Lemeric

    Yass! thanks for this. Every mom out there who feels like every responsibility is given to her should read this. Now that I have a preschooler, two hours without him would suffice. 😀

  • Tola

    This entire post is so true and completely rings true for me. I need to indulge myself more often, very soon your kids grow and you ha e lost yourself completely being Mom you don’t know where to start

  • Brandi

    You have some great tips. I’m not a mom, but definitely, think I use a lot of these tips to help improve self-care.

  • Marjie Mare

    I enjoy coming to your corner where I can read about real mom’s life. Once in a while, when the kids are away, I enjoy that me time at home, blasting the music and just being lazy.

  • Tonya Michelle

    Preach!! The little things in life are so important and doing a little something for yourself every once in a while is beneficial for everyone!

  • Laurie

    The picture of you with the glass of wine and your feet in the soaker made me smile. You look so darn content and happy. Although I am not a mom, I know how important taking time for yourself is to one’s psyche. I think I am going to grab myself a glass of wine after reading this post. 🙂

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