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Craftless and a Hotmess

**This post contains Amazon Affiliate products. All proceeds go directly into my pocket…who am I kidding, I’m a mom of four and a college student, all proceeds go towards pizza for the kids and wine for me.**

I’m going to come clean here guys, I HATE CRAFTS. Yes. that’s right, I am NOT a crafting mom. I am an early childhood/special education major and will gladly create some awesome crafts for my students to do, but at home it’s just not happening. I don’t crochet, cricket, knit, or any other fancy crafts moms are doing these days. I’m not sure why people assume that once you become a mom, it’s mandatory to not only be crafty, but to like it too??

I don’t have a crafting bone in my body. I can’t even draw stick figures without getting laughed at. When I try to knit or crochet, my fingers suddenly stop working and it just ends with me cussing out the needles and throwing it all away. My Facebook is literally full of people posting all this adorable crafty items that they are selling. I see these cute little craft rooms, filled with crafting equipment, art supplies, glitter. So MUCH GLITTER, glue, googly eyes, sewing machines, you name it, they got it. Wanna know what I got? I’ve got a window sill, with empty bottles of wine lined up all around it. I have this wonderful idea of making cute little vases out of them, but all I end up doing is drinking the bottle, rinsing it out and placing it on the window sill. Maybe some day I will actually get around to creating those vases, but instead I’m kinda enjoying the collection process.

I will gladly get down on the floor to play with my four beautiful children. I will walk with them to the park, ride bikes, take them to the library, and read them books. You wanna throw down and have a karaoke dance party? I’m your mom. Are you feeling like an all day movie marathon with popcorn, pizza, and all other kinds of junk food? Pick the movie and I’ll do the dialing. I will do nearly anything inside or outside to avoid doing crafts at home.

“It’s a great way to relieve stress and have some me time.”

That’s what people tell me, my answer is, “red or white, and Netflix.”

 

Now don’t get me wrong, if you can whip up a cute blanket and matching beanie, or a beautiful crayon art canvas, then by all means. More power to you. It’s just not for me, not gonna happen, that’s a hard NO for me. I have two main reasons why I choose not to be the crafting mom.

  1. My crazy schedule. I am the mom of four children (7,5,2.5, 7 months), who require cleaning up after, therapy runs 3 days a week, hot(ish) meals, and clean(ish) clothes. On top of all this running around, I am also going to school full time to become a teacher.
  2. I am the mom of four beautiful angels and when I say angels, I am specifically referring to angles similar to Lucifer. You laugh, but these kids are CRAZY. I love them to death, but they be CRAZY.

So you see, I simply do not have the time, nay, the energy to craft. It’s just not in the cards for me. That doesn’t mean I am without skills, though. Have I mentioned I birthed 4 babies??? If that doesn’t count as a skill, then how about the fact that I can make a mean pizza from scratch? To go along with that homemade pizza, I can pour a glass of wine like you’ve never seen. These are serious skills that you need in life, especially if you are living the chaotic life that I am. On top of those AMAZING skills I have, I am also a fierce mother, and I will do ANYTHING in my power to make sure my babies have the life they deserve. I’m am their biggest fan, their loudest cheerleader, their most enthusiastic advocate, and I will continue to be those things day in and day out as long as they need me to.

When you see a cute little craft that you think would be a fun activity for me to do with my kids, let me save you the time and effort by just telling you I’m probably not going to do it. I have an entire Pinterest board specifically aimed at crafts for my students that you are more than welcomed to contribute to, though. So instead of crafts, feel free to tag me in cool pizza ideas, dance party, local readings, play dates (that don’t involve crafts), or pretty much any thing besides craft ideas to do at home.

Does it really matter if I don’t want to craft with my kids or even by myself? Does that somehow make me less of a mom when you compare me with all the Karens and Suzzies in the world? I’m gonna go with no, no that does not make me less of a mom. It doesn’t make me lazy either. It makes me a realist, because I am real sure that the person left to clean up all that craft supply, would be me. There is no way that my kids would ever pick up crafts when they are done, I’m pretty sure they don’t even wipe properly after going to the bathroom. It makes me practical, because I am practically sure that the whole crafting would just end up being a scream fest with everyone crying and throwing things around the room.

So where does that leave me?

Well, it leaves me here, 6:43 on a Thursday night during Christmas break. It’s probably the perfect time to do a sweet little craft with my kids and make some memories, but instead I’m over here waiting for that clock to turn to 7:00 so I can get the 2 year old off of my neck, hand the baby over to dad, give the older 2 a tablet and send them to their rooms, while I pop open a wine bottle, pour a glass and add to the growing wine bottles on my window sill. It leaves me sipping on that wine, watching some show on Netflix or Hulu, regretting nothing, because I am a damn good mother just the way I am; craftless and a hotmess!

Some Craftless Hotmess Buys

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